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(Return to the English 2311 Syllabus)

Exercise 2:
Reducing Low-Information Content

 Instructions:
Reduce the wordiness of these sentences.  In each case, the author has used unnecessary terms that contribute little or nothing to the meaning of the sentence.

1. On the day of January 7, in the year of our Lord 2003, what appeared unquestionably to be a power outage effected a disruption in the work for better than four sixty minute periods.
2. The company has installed a scanning device in the vicinity of No. 2 production line.
3. The scanner should increase quality control of the parts that have been assembled.
4. If in the event that you have any more problems with the aforementioned scanner, contact me by telephone.
5. We have reached the point of a necessity to hire two additional product assembly technicians during the period of  May 1st and June 30th.
6. The 4Tell software has the capacity of avoiding the slippage of the schedule.
7. The Freeling Lake Mine survey project is approximately three days and one half behind.
8. It has come to our attention that after reviewing the inventory that approximately six to eight Nabuchi 2001 computers cannot be accounted for.
9. After a discussion it was decided by the executive committee that an amount of funds totaling a figure of $180,000 should be set aside for the implementation of building improvements in the year of 2000.
10. The introduction of a solution called Limasol Plus had the effect of reducing the amount of acidity by a percentage totaling 22%.
11. A disturbing account has been our discovery of discrepancies between funds projected for the year and expenditures actually accrued between January 1 and December 31 for 1998.
12.  Operating the engine in excess of speeds of 1500 rpm will like increase the damage to the limit of the bearings.
13. These drawings that you see here are in reference to the May 12 tentative plan for the possible modification of the MicroStat, in accordance with the designated directive TP-7.
14. If you’re planning to repair the 220 printer, make sure you can still find the parts.
15. If we work an additional 45 minutes per day in January, we should be back on schedule by February 1st.
16.  In order to check the correct temperature, insert vertically a 5’ foot probe down into the mound of the grain.
17. It is necessary that you register for the Institute in Technical Management for next year on or before the date of December the 15th.
18. The estimated cost of maintenance for the Abacus control system between the dates of July 1, 1998 and June 30, 2003, will be in the vicinity of $270,000 up to $310,000.
19. There is a tendency for the left tire in the front to shimmy at speeds between 66 and 72 mph.
20. With the completion of this last sentence, you will have concluded the exercise on LIC expressions.

Learning Objectives Addressed in These Exercises
1) Improve your written communication so that you can be understood by your fellow co-workers and management.

2) Recognize that communication exists between the technical specialist and the writing specialist within the Firm and the working world.

3) Find that aiming your technical writing at an uninformed reader (any individual who is not as knowledgeable about your topic as you are) increases your awareness of the need of all communication to be presented clearly.

5) Demonstrate the principles and practice of the kind of writing required for your technical and professional work.

7) Demonstrate the mechanics of style and manner that you will need for your technical report writing and professional report writing.

8) Utilize current computer software programs to design and produce documents assigned, some of which will include visuals.

Submission of the Paper
Using your first initial and last name, name and save your file exactly like this:

JDoe-Ex2

E-mail your essay as an attachment to Dr. Grimes at geoffrey.grimes@navarrocollege.edu.

How to Send  Emails to me
When sending emails, always include the following information in your message window (the space where you write your comments):

1) Your first and last name (ex. Geoffrey Grimes)
2) Your course name, course number, course section number (ENGL 2311:NTM)
3) The date
4) The file name of the exercise you are attaching

Example:
Geoffrey Grimes
Engl 2311:NTM
June 20, 200X
JDoe-Ex2

Sending Assignments to me
When sending me your exercises, place the following information in the subject line:
Your first initial/last name-file name of the exercise

Example: JDoe-Ex2

Sending  Questions to me

When sending me a question about your work or the course,  place the following information in the subject line:
Your first initial/last name-Question

Example: JDoe-Question

Do NOT attach any exercise to a question.  I will delete it and ask you to resend it to me.

Sending Comments to me
When sending me a comment about your work or the course, place the following information in the subject line:
Your first initial/last name-Comment

Example: JDoe-Comment

Do NOT attach any exercise to a question.  I will delete it and ask you to resend it to me.

Sending Urgent Messages to me

When sending an urgent message to me about your work or the course, place the following information in the subject line:
Your first initial/last name-Urgent

Example: JDoe-Urgent 

Do NOT attach any exercise to a question.  I will delete it and ask you to resend it to me.

Evaluation
Your compositions will be evaluated on the basis of the following criteria:
1) Clear demonstration of the concepts of pattern of writing or the purpose of the composition
2) Demonstrated mastery of the conventions of standard written American English
3) Timely submission